skips a beat

*sigh*
he's soooo damn adorable
a super simple and quiet guy
but adorable nonetheless =)

accidents

do happen.

fuck it.....!

blergh....

silat truly ruined my mood for today
i chose the wrong group that practices at 4pm and NOT in the morning
and have i told that it's on a fucking saturday?
fucking fuckity fuck fuck!
how am i suppose to go back home if i had to go to silat practices at 4pm on saturdays?!!?!!??!!
fuck it
now my mood is totally ruined
and my holidays have the potential to suck in accordance to my future sulkingness.
damn it!
i will try my best next week to switch groups.
if i were not to succeed, help me.....

almost confession of a (kinda) broken heart...

oh my. my heart is hurting. again.
when i thought that the light was going to finally, fully shine through
darkness came creeping sprinting in full speed.

i was finally elated
my heart was finally rid of the ache that had set a few months ago
my friends all kind of congratulated me
pushing me closer and closer to that person
made me happy and happier with each smirks from my friends
whenever that person was around
i was almost on cloud nine...

but then, that person became happy again
and my (love) life turned upside down yet again
i was sad again
but it doesn't matter
i don't want to wait again
it kills me each and every time i see them
but now
i'm happy for that person if they are happy themselves
and i shall move on
and find someone else
someone much, much better
for me =)

<3

Holidays.....

...can sometimes be a bore. it's been a month since the holidays started and nothing much happened. there was the occasional birthdays and celebration like Raya Haji and whatnot, but i'm hard to please and i hate social interactions, especially with distant family members during gatherings on one of the event stated above. mostly because i always don't know what to say to them, to start a conversation, and that they never really notice me anyways. and it does help that i'm oh-soo-shy and have a low self esteem. so, almost all the time, i'm bored....and lame.

and this holiday, i spent most of my weekends and a whole lot of my time in shopping malls. my parents' anniversary is coming up, so my dad asked us to look something nice for our mum, so, we decided to find her a new designer handbag since she only has one. so i spent most of my weekends with my sisters inside gucci and ferragamo and fendi and whatnot and it's no fun. i hate designer boutique. i hate their snotty workers who scrutinized your every move, my every move, as if i'm not self-conscious enough. FU. thank goodness that we finally found one for our mum and that to me, at least, the ordeal of having to face those pruney-faced people in the stores is finally over.

so now, i'm just lazing around on my bed with a laptop on my lap doing this and other things each and every hour of every single day.

i need to get a life. an exciting one perhaps.

this heart, it beats...

beats for only you..

my heart
still skips a beat when i think about him
or saw his face
i guess that i'm not yet over him
although we have never been together to start with
and he's with another person
and i was only days late
oh well
*sigh*

mardy bum

dum dee dum dee dum
in the computer lab
doing assignment
air condition's fucking ass cold
fingers gonna be frostbitten any moment now
blergh
oh and
paipaipai's putting on mardy bum
yayness wooo!

over and out.